Default to Positive

Calm body of water during golden hour

Hello

Good morning

I appreciate that

Yes

Okay

Let’s go

You first

I’m sorry

I will

You’re great

I love you

Thank you

That’s awesome

Good for you

Good luck

Good anything

These words are the passwords to the universe. And you don’t have to even feel like using them to … Read more...

Touched

My personal shirts collection

Years ago, in my twenties, back when I hid my tears, I found myself lodged between the screams of my mother and my girlfriend. We’d driven up from San Francisco to my grandpa’s house where now only my mom lived.

We chose an Italian restaurant. At dinner, my girlfriend … Read more...

The Honor of Being Slept On

man laying on bed beside dog

I woke up yesterday, was wide awake. I had ideas that needed to get out, creative energy asking for daylight.

But my arm was under my wife. I gave a slow pull but she didn’t respond. She was out.

So I laid there.

For an hour.

I thought about things, worked some stuff out. She s… Read more...

Done with Oppression

silhouette of woman standing on beach during sunset

I’m done with stories of oppression — Twelve Years of a Slave, The Piano, The Handmaid’s Tale…

I need no more evidence of our ugliness. I know it’s there. It’s so there.

And I don’t need what comes after that either: vengeful violence of a … Read more...

Tired Not Tired

Shallow focus photo of woman leaning on doorway

It’s okay that you’re tired at the end of the day.

You’ve worked hard. It takes a lot. Mentally. Physically.

You’re human!

Up and down is our way forward.

Just because you’re tired, doesn’t mean you have to rethink your life.

Instead, when you recog… Read more...

Lying Down & Getting Up

Home

The problem with Self Help is that it presupposes there is something wrong with the way you are now.

But fully embracing your current state, whatever that may be, can prevent meaningful growth and change.

Take the simple example of lying on the couch. When you resent yourself for l… Read more...