Best & Worst Moments

The headline in my news feed today read: “Best & Worst Moments of the 2020 Music Awards.”

I admit, I was tempted to click on it, but then I had a realization that this headline is what is destroying us.

Sadly, this is all we get now: the best and the worst of everyt… Read more...

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Tough Decisions

Photo of pathway surrounded by fir trees

My daughter is picking her high school – 2 good options – and she’s tormented by it.

We all are.

I’ve made a career out of helping people make decisions. I know the exercises, I have the tactics, the methods, the rubrics.

That doesn’t make the actual de… Read more...

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My Anxiety

It took a while, but it came.

I thought I was immune, but no one is.

There is a tree with thick, knuckly roots driving into the soft green earth. Its branches do all sorts of interesting things: hold nests and tire swings, block the hot sun, reach into other trees, click against on… Read more...

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Let The Thing Reveal Itself

Woman wearing teal dress sitting on chair talking to man

We talk big when we’re trying to convince someone of something. Big words, long sentences. Multiple paragraphs.

The other day, I was talking with a friend of a friend about something important — national politics or smog or something. We were both taking turns making o… Read more...

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The House

maroon brick surface

A white man looked out his window and saw a black woman in her yard, pulling her house apart. He noticed her doing this every day, sometimes just a single brick took all afternoon. She was using a spoon.

He couldn’t stay away for very long.

“Why are you destroying your … Read more...

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Acting Out

grayscale photo of police riot team on pedestrian lane

Riots are not the problem.

In Family Therapy, the person who acts out — the cheating husband, the depressed wife, the son who threw a brick through the neighbor’s car window — this person is not to be vilified, not to be punished. Quite the opposite, actually.

If … Read more...

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The Wasp Among Butterflies

Early evening yesterday, after looking at a fallen tree in the yard and a deflated basketball, I snapped at my daughter. A loud snap, from the stomach and lungs.

Crap.

I was having such a good day, perfect marks for the peaceful dad – and then BOOM! This happens. There goes m… Read more...

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The Race

I was helping my daughter put together her pinewood derby car for Girl Scouts. We were laying on our stomachs lining up the nail to go through the tire at the exact right angle. As I was explaining why it was important to make sure the tire doesn’t rub the wood she surprise… Read more...

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