Default to Positive

Calm body of water during golden hour

Hello

Good morning

I appreciate that

Yes

Okay

Let’s go

You first

I’m sorry

I will

You’re great

I love you

Thank you

That’s awesome

Good for you

Good luck

Good anything

These words are the passwords to the universe. And you don’t have to even feel like using them to … Read more...

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Old People & Young People

Silhouette of man standing on seashore during sunset

Old people tend to tell young people they’re too idealistic.

And young people tend to disregard their elders as burned out.

There’s some truth here.

Old people (and I include myself in this wisdom-rich population) are, indeed, pretty burned out. How can we not be?

Life i… Read more...

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Nostalgia Has A Shelf Life

Black and silver cassette player

I grew up on Hip Hop, studied Yo! MTV Rap videos with my brother to learn how to move, bought the albums, mouthed the lyrics on the bus.

The lyrics. Yikes.

I was singing “Poison” by Bel Biv DeVoe the other day – a seemingly benign recitation… And then I got … Read more...

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Lying Down & Getting Up

Home

The problem with Self Help is that it presupposes there is something wrong with the way you are now.

But fully embracing your current state, whatever that may be, can prevent meaningful growth and change.

Take the simple example of lying on the couch. When you resent yourself for l… Read more...

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The Quiet Coach

Man sitting on rock during golden hour

I’ve always felt that someone is watching me, particularly in times of great decisions, not necessarily life decisions, just those little moments of personal risk when the ego is worried about its edges.

Jumping off a cliff
Dancing at a wedding
Playing on a playground
Speaking … Read more...

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Swimming with Rocks

school of fish, fish, nature

You’ve been diving in the same place for a while now.

With time, you’ve collected the prettiest of all the rocks. You keep them underwater because you don’t like how they look above the surface.

Your rock pile.

Each day, when you submerge, you notice (and have come… Read more...

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I Conquered My Dreams

selective focus photography of boy wearing black Batman cape

I’m the hero of my dreams.

I’m talking about anxiety dreams, the ones we all have and talk about in the waking world. You know the ones…

The naked-in-public dream: I beat that one by giving up the search for clothes and just being naked. Fuck it. I even started to… Read more...

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Tough Decisions

Photo of pathway surrounded by fir trees

My daughter is picking her high school – 2 good options – and she’s tormented by it.

We all are.

I’ve made a career out of helping people make decisions. I know the exercises, I have the tactics, the methods, the rubrics.

That doesn’t make the actual de… Read more...

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The Elements of Happiness

Pug in a blanket

The Elements of Happiness are obvious.

We all know what they are:
healthy food, rest, exercise, sobriety, nature, connection, work, love, fun, self-expression.

We have the map. If we just charge after these things and do them often, we have a greater chance of being Happy. It’… Read more...

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